One Mom's Triumph Over Diabetes & Resilience After Divorce w/Tracy Herbert

J. Rosemarie Francis: 0:00 In this battle of life, it's hard to keep your head above the water To win this fight. My guest today is Tracy Herbert. Thank you for coming and speaking to us today, tracy. I appreciate you. Tracy Herbert: 0:28 Oh it's. I'm so looking forward to this conversation. This is near and dear to my heart. J. Rosemarie Francis: 0:32 Ok sure All right. So before we start talking about what you do, which is a lot, could you tell us who is Tracy? Tracy Herbert: 0:45 I am a person that is encouraging people to have hope, no matter their circumstances, their age, their diagnosis, marital status, all of those things, because without hope we have nothing. And that's what I want people to know about Tracy is she's the hope person that says you could do it, no matter what your obstacles are. J. Rosemarie Francis: 1:06 Yeah, makes sense. Amen, thank you for that. All right, so I was reading your bio just now and your your says Tracy is a leading authority on health and wellness. She's a transformational health and longevity coach, professional speaker, best selling author, podcast host and diabetes advocate. You're also a sought after speaker that sees you appear infrequently on TV shows. So quite popular and quite busy lady. But the most important thing that I see here, if I may say so, is that you are a grandmother of six and yes, and you believe in living your, your living life to the fullest, no matter your age or diagnosis. So tell me, tracy, what inspired you to go down this path of health and wellness. Tracy Herbert: 2:10 I at the age of 17,. I was lying in a hospital bed fighting for my life. I was in ICU. The noises were scary. I had no clue what was going on, except I knew I was very, very sick. And the doctor walks in, he puts his hands on his hips and he says young lady, you've got juvenile diabetes. You're going to be dead in 20 years. You're going to die with horrible complications, you will have your legs amputated, You'll be on dialysis, You'll go blind. I mean, yada, yada, yada. He kept going and going. Wow, nice. And he said, oh. And he said you're never going to be able to have children. And as he turned around and walked out of the hospital, the hospital room, I was sitting there thinking what did he just say? I didn't even get to ask any questions. But he said you're going to have to learn how to give yourself shots several times a day because there isn't a cure. And he walked out and I had no hope, which is why I'm a firm believer that we have to have hope no matter what's going on in our lives. And so I was sitting there, just shocked. Now we call it type one diabetes. There are several kinds of diabetes. We're not gonna go into that, because that's not what this is about. When I was diagnosed, I had to learn how to give myself shots, Like I said multiple times a day, and I was going to a movie the first time I'd gotten out of the hospital. I was 17, senior in high school, and all my friends and I were going to a movie and as I walked in, I remember my mom saying don't eat anything. Now, she didn't say it because we didn't have any money, she just said it because she was helping me learn discipline. And so what I did was I walked up to the concession stand clerk while all my friends were getting soft drinks, handy popcorn, and I asked for a small cup so I could get a drink out of the water fountain. And the concession stand clerk said no and I said, oh, I'll be glad to pay for the cup. This was way before diet, soft drinks, way before bottled water, way before any of this stuff. And she said no, and I, just all of the anxiety, the fear, the depression, all came out and I'm running out to my car. Why me? I mean, I'm literally screaming this. Why me? I got home and I was laying in bed, sobbing, sobbing, thinking well, my life is over. And all of a sudden I said, Tracy, you have two choices you could be better or you can be bitter. And what are you gonna choose? And at that moment, at 17 years old, I said I choose to be better. And that's what I've been doing for the last 47 years now Just trying to be better every day, trying to encourage people, no matter what you're going through. I went through a horrific divorce and I was a solo mom for many, many, many years, and that was just one little avenue of my journey. But my journey has been going on for my whole life because we have to have the right mindset, no matter what we're struggling with, and you have to say I can do it, I can do blank, no matter what. I can do this, no matter what. So that's kind of just a quick little snapshot of what I'm all about and what led me to where I am today. J. Rosemarie Francis: 5:34 Wow, so you didn't take the doctor's diagnosis, as God given, did you? No, you didn't listen, right, okay, good. Tracy Herbert: 5:46 No, no, no, because doctors are often wrong, and back then in the 70s, we thought doctors were everything. But I'm glad I didn't listen to it. But it is funny because all the doctors I meet either I'm speaking from stage or on podcasts or whatever. The first thing they ask is what are you doing and what are you still alive? And so it's just my belief. I have a strong belief system in faith. I'm a very faith-filled person, so it's easy for me to understand that, why I'm still alive? Because I still have things that I need to accomplish in my life before I die. So that's just kind of the way I feel. J. Rosemarie Francis: 6:25 Yes, yeah, absolutely. I mean, you have to listen to two things your body, which was created to take care of us, Right? And I often argue with people and tell them that God gave me this body. He didn't give it to a doctor, he gave it to me and there's a reason he gave it to me, right? No, I appreciate you inspiring us to think more in that respect, because a lot of times we get a diagnosis and we just succumb to hopelessness. Tracy Herbert: 7:04 Yes, yes, and without hope, we have nothing. That's the problem. And I started realizing. I started writing my book, my first book. I started realizing okay, Tracy, why are you still alive? And what have you learned? And what's interesting is it came into my 3M formula. And if you all don't hear anything else today, this is so important and will transform your life, because I have more energy in my 60s than I even had in my 30s. That's very unusual for most people, but what it is is mind, mouth and move. Like I mentioned earlier, we have to have the right mindset, because without the right mindset, we are gonna fall. And then mouth we have to learn to eat, to live. Don't live to eat and move. We have to get off our chairs and move more. Now, I'm not talking about running a marathon, I'm not talking about anything like that. I'm just saying we gotta get up, go for a walk, go dancing, garden, whatever you enjoy doing, because if you enjoy doing it, you're gonna do it over and over again. J. Rosemarie Francis: 8:09 Yes, yes, and it's all about discipline and taking responsibility for who you are right. Tracy Herbert: 8:17 Right, yeah, and making the right choices. You know, without the right choices, you're gonna choose blank something that you like to eat, or you could choose something healthy. Fill in the blank, you know what you're gonna eat. And when you start making the small little changes every day, you're gonna start transforming your body and your life more than you can even imagine. And it's not that difficult. We tend to think it's difficult, but it's really not. J. Rosemarie Francis: 8:46 Yeah, yeah, all right. So we talk about your oh, we talk about your three M's and your shifting mindset regarding your diagnosis with type one diabetes. What prompted you to cycle, to start cycling, was that part of your M? Was that your third M? Tracy Herbert: 9:10 Yes, yes, and I've always. I was always an athlete, even before I was diagnosed. I always loved sports, doing the kind of sport things I loved running, I loved riding my bicycle. And so every decade, after 20 years of living with diabetes, I decided to do something epic to celebrate. And so for my 20th anniversary of my diagnosis because I choose to be better, not better, and at this time I was 37. And I signed up for a bicycle ride there's 100 miles, just 100 mile bicycle ride and enjoyed it. And then next year, the next decade after that, I decided to celebrate my diagnosis by doing a triathlon, because I'm afraid of water, but I knew I got to do something every day. That frightens me. So I chose I'm going to do a triathlon. And then, as my anniversary my 40th year of having diabetes I decided to ride my bicycle across the United States, and I started at the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco and I ended at the Brooklyn Bridge in New York City under the Dr Osho after that, and it was just life changing for me seeing people, meeting people all throughout the country that were willing to help me. But if you don't mind, I'd like to share a quick story. Would that be okay if I shared a story with you, of course yes, because this is going to, this is so impactful to so many people. But when I was in Sacramento, you know, after leaving San Francisco, I was in Sacramento and I was waiting for the light to turn green, while I was sitting there on my bicycle and a lady said oh, it must be nice to ride your bicycle across the city. And I said Well, actually I'm going to New York City, but I had that gut feeling. You know how you get that gut feeling. I wanted to get off the bike and go talk to her while she was at the bus stop. She was a sweet, sweet, sweet lady, extremely overweight, very young, beautiful smile and one of the best personalities of anybody I've ever met. And she started telling me I'm waiting for my brother to come pick me up because I can't walk home from the bus stop. And I said oh, I'm sorry. She said, but it's only a couple of houses away. I mean, she was embarrassed. I said Don't be embarrassed. And she's like Well, I have to rely on some of my family members to pick me up when I get off the bus. And so the health coach and me started coming out and I started saying Can you do this? No, I can't. Can you do this? No, I can't. Well, I knew I needed to change her. I can't, I can't. So I said Could you walk to the end of your driveway? And for a second she said I think I can. Yes, that's what I wanted. So I started telling her Walk to your driveway, rest, walk back, you know. Do that for several days and then maybe try to walk next door and go a little further every single day. As a time I got into riding my bicycle into New York City, I got a text message from her and she said I have to let you know I just signed up for my first 5k walk. Wow, this was a lady that couldn't even walk, I know three or four houses down. And now she signed up her first 3.1 mile walk. And she said Well, I didn't even understand. Tracy is, not only do I have much more energy, but the weight's coming off. And she said I never would have believed it. And so small little things every day don't seem significant, but when you, every day, you consistently, you just are a powerful mind, blowing what you can accomplish in just a few short weeks, months, years. J. Rosemarie Francis: 12:53 Yes, yes, and it's always important to listen to that small voice, because you never know. Yeah. Tracy Herbert: 13:03 And she's just a great testimony of how it takes. You know, for example, if I would have left San Francisco saying, oh, I've got 3,527 miles before I get to the Brooklyn Bridge in New York City, I would have been overwhelmed. But every day I said I'm going for a bike ride. You know, like we did as kids. Yeah, and little little steps equals huge things in anything in life. Cleaning the house, I mean everything, gardening, exercise, eating the right things. I don't say give up everything unhealthy today, no, just replace one thing, do something here, do something there and see what happens. J. Rosemarie Francis: 13:43 Yes, yes, thank you. Thank you for sharing that story too. Brooklyn Bridge, one of my favorite places to walk. So yeah, all right. So let's shift for a minute to the solo mom part. This is solo mom's talk, and you mentioned that for a period of time, you were a solo mom, a divorced mom. Can you tell us how that happened, what challenges you faced as a solo parent, and then tell me how you overcame that challenge? Tracy Herbert: 14:19 It was. My children and I left with $22 in our pocket or my pocket, and we escaped that's. It was a very, very, very bad situation and I was scared to even leave. But then I was even more scared when we left until we got into a safe location where I knew we would be safer. And that's where I really struggled, because, you know, I've always been the person saying, oh, you can do it, you can do it, you can do it, and I knew I could. But it took me a long time to be able to really understand what had happened in my life. And then I had two children looking to me. Come on, mom, you're the strength of this family. You know what are we going to do? And the sweetest thing was our first Christmas, when we were just the three of us. People had taken up their favorite Christmas decorations and brought it to our little place that we were living because they wanted us to have something special from their house. And what a unique. Because we didn't have any of our memorabilia because we had left it where we were staying with my now ex-husband. But what's so interesting was I kind of pulled myself off, you know, up every day. I was struggling to wake up, not wake up. I was struggling to get out of bed but I started saying, okay, tracy, what are you thankful for today? There's three things you've got to be thankful for. Well, I had two children, so that was easy. Two, two, two, you know two children. But then what's the third thing, tracy, I'm like it's another day of life and the first day I did that. The second day I started increasing my gratitude because you have to be thankful in every circumstance. It's made me a much stronger person today than I ever was, even before we left and before our divorce. But what's so important was once I really started understanding okay, tracy, you're safe, because safety is critical, especially for females. I mean, we thrive on being safe. And I started just doing some small. Back to exercising again, because I had given up exercise for probably six months, which made my blood sugar is even worse. The stress, the non-exercising I was having to grab things to eat because we didn't have. I mean, it was a real challenge. But what was so exciting about this was I started doing exercises at the house. We had no money. I mean, the kids and I were. We had money. We were very blessed. Let me rephrase that we were very blessed, but we didn't have money to spend on anything other than the necessity. And so, because of that, I started doing calisthenics, I started doing jumping jacks, I started doing sit-ups, push-ups Everything I could come up with that was free. So that's why I don't like people say, oh, you can't get healthy because I don't have any money. You can do anything, you just have to find different avenues. And then the weather would get better and I'd start going for a walk. Once I knew the kids were okay. And then my kids both played sports, and so they always practiced in a high school track, you know, high school field after school, and when they were doing their, their programs, I would be on the track and I would walk, I would walk and I would walk and I would walk. Then I started adding a little bit of running on the curvature parts of the track. Now that's beginning to get me back into the shape I needed to be in. But without the physical activity I wouldn't have had the positive mindset again, because to me it all boils down to the positive mindset. People kept saying, oh, this is horrible, you poor, poor, poor thing. Then I kept saying, okay, tracy, refocus that. What am I going to say? No, I'm very blessed, we're alive, we're safe, we're healthy, we're happy. That took quite a bit of time, but then I had to work on myself. If I could even work on my kids and help my kids, yes, they were able to do things with other people. They were able to get healthy on their own and with some help from professional people. But I had to take care of myself first. I knew it. Just like we find an airplane, the flight attendant says if something happens, put the air mask on you before you help other people, because if you don't put your air mask on, you're not going to be able to help anybody. The same analogy is for everything. Once I really started taking control of my health again, like I had been, and then once I really started reading positive quotes, listening to encouraging music, trying to figure out, I was always going to the library and checking out books on what people did to improve their mindsets. That started the fact, the path of me getting to where I am today. Actually, I always say there's only been two extremely traumatic things in my life my diagnosis of diabetes and having a divorce and leaving my ex-husband. Those were the two most tragic things in my life. But now I look at it as a blessing. Because of my diagnosis I am so much healthier and it's more important to me to continue to have more energy as I get into my 70s and 80s than I did in my 30s, but also because I pulled myself up when I was in a very horrible time. I just found ways to engage with other people. We had a funny thing In our neighborhood or our community where we lived. I used to go on Friday nights. They had game night at the local college. It was all people, probably in their 70s and 80s, sitting around and playing games dominoes, cars, board games. I started going. My kids thought that was funny. After they were older enough that they could be home by themselves or they started going out with their friends. I'd go play games with these people because social support was so important. These people didn't know my past. They didn't know what I was going through. They didn't know anything. But we just went and I kept thinking this is so amazing. I knew I didn't have to worry about people trying to match me up with somebody or a dating pool, because I didn't want to date. I didn't want to do any of that stuff. I just wanted to be with other people, other like-minded people who just like to play games and things. So that was huge in my walk during my divorce and then years after that.

J. Rosemarie Francis: 20:57 Yeah, wow, thank you. That's a very inspirational story, because so many times we get bogged down in the situations that happen and we cry always me and you know, we, we, we misdirect that energy instead of putting it into making ourselves better, making our situation better. So thank you for sharing all of that. I appreciate it. Alright, so tell us what you do for your clients and how we can get in touch with you. Tracy Herbert: 21:30 Okay, first and foremost, my website, traceyherbertcom, has free resources. If you need anything like help on anything, it's going to be in that website, on that front page, and if you want to watch a short three and a half minute clip of my bicycle ride across the country, it's at the very bottom of my home page. But then I help clients go from feeling hopeless to I have hope. I have help clients that help with their health. I help with them with their trainings, different things but most importantly, I help people realize it's not too late. As long as we have breath, we have all the time in the world. So I work with my clients very small increments, just like the lady I met in Sacramento at the bus stop Do this one thing, do you like it? You know I'm more of their guide. I'm not even consider myself as a coach. I'm their guide. What do you want to do? What brings you joy? Because if it brings you joy, you're going to do it over and over. But if I tell somebody, okay, I only want you to eat apples and I only want you to eat eggs, and you don't like eggs or you don't like apple or you don't like salad, okay, then it's not going to work for you. The same thing with exercise. If I say, go ride your bicycle. A lot of people don't like riding their bicycles, especially across the United States, but it doesn't matter, find activities you enjoy. I'm working with a lady right now who she just is older and all she wanted to do was garden. That's all. She missed being able to get in the floor and garden. So we just started off by just having her get on her dining room chairs without arms. So pay attention to this a little bit and cross her arms like this and then just start getting up and down from the chair without even using your hands that little thing. And then we started working on ways she could start having more flexibility. Just from very simple poses. She started changing her diet so her joints didn't hurt so bad and now she's gardening in the ground. She's so thankful. But just things like that is so important and sometimes it takes an outside person. You can't figure things out always on your own, but when you find somebody that's got the right mindset and holds you accountable Because accountability is so important, yeah. J. Rosemarie Francis: 23:47 Yeah, thank you. So we'll put the link to your website on the show notes when we publish this interview, but you also have a podcast. Tell us about the podcast. Tracy Herbert: 24:01 Actually, two of them Longivity codes talks about aging and getting healthier as you age Some of my strategies and the other one is your diabetes breakthrough, which talks about awesome. Very little about type one diabetes. Mostly it's for people with pre diabetes and type two diabetes, because that's epidemic and it's continuing to rise exponentially. Then now the WHO is calling it a pandemic because so many people are being diagnosed with diabetes, and so that's also what I do is talk about just different strategies, different things. I've learned Interviews with both podcasts have interviews with physicians, medical team, researchers and so forth Right. But it's amazing when I work with, when I work with a client who has diabetes or pre diabetes, and the doctor's like you have, you're on your last. You know, if you don't get it this blood sugar under control, you're going to go on medication and they'll start working with me and they say three months later they're like I don't need your medication. The doctors are like keep doing what you're doing. So simple things out there that people don't think they can do. It's very, very simple. J. Rosemarie Francis: 25:09 Yes, thank you. I appreciate you, tracy, for coming and talking to us today, and this is an amazing interview. We have some technical difficulties, but it didn't stop us, did it? Tracy Herbert: 25:22 Yeah, sure it's been wonderful, and I just want people to remember don't ever lose hope. Whatever you're struggling with, there's a solution out there. Find what works best for you, because we're all different. J. Rosemarie Francis: 25:34 Yes, all right. So before I let you go, I'm going to ask you to give a solo mom a couple of tips, one or two, of how they can navigate becoming and staying healthy, while juggling solar parenting the most important for me. Tracy Herbert: 25:52 When I was a solo mom, the most important thing for me was my children. But, like I mentioned, without me taking control of my health, they wouldn't be where they are today because I got healthier. But what you have to do is you have to take things very slowly, but also start replacing just one item. So, for example, maybe tomorrow morning drink a glass of water. If you can do filtered water, that's even better, because the tap water a lot of places are very unhealthy. But just replace your first cup of coffee with a big glass of water. Or, before you eat a meal, drink a big glass of water, because it's proven you're going to eat fewer calories. So it doesn't have to be like all or nothing. And then, like I said, get off the chairs and move more. Maybe involve your kids, go to the park, play games, whatever you can do. A lot of people can't run, ok. Then go play freeze tag I mean everybody can play freeze tag. Or go for a walk, get out in nature. There's so many opportunities If you have money or you don't have money that you can do that you can build great memories. Pick up a game and play with your kids in the evenings and just laugh. I mean, my kids still talk about some of the dumb things we used to do, but it was just so much fun, because having fun is good for your health. A lap a day keeps a doctor away. It is so important.

J. Rosemarie Francis: 27:15 Yeah, thank you, thank you for sharing that. And, yeah, I raised three sons and every now and again we reminisce about those times and, yeah, we get a good laugh. Yeah, yes, oh, yeah. All right, thank you very much, tracy Herbert, for coming and speaking to us today. Any parting shots? It's just like I said, don't ever lose hope. Tracy Herbert: 27:39 Get a good night's sleep. If you have extra laundry, you have to do it at night. I was guilty of this. I'm admitting it. I was guilty, but then you start realizing sleep is more important. Laundry is going to wait, dishes are going to wait. Most things we think are critical is going to wait. But get plenty of sleep, like I said, drink lots of water and don't forget mind, mouth and move, and you're going to see some changes rather quickly if you start doing this the way, the right way. Yeah, really awesome, thank you. J. Rosemarie Francis: 28:09 I appreciate you.