Self-Control: The Secret to Success and Happiness w/ Tracy Pleschourt

J. Rosemarie Francis: 0:00

Tired, weary, frustrated. What would you be doing if you weren't raising children alone? What's stopping you from living your best life? Now, on Solo Moms! Talk, I discuss with solar mothers the challenges you face raising children alone. So if you're a working solar mom dealing with independent children, insensitive bosses, weight and health issues or even debt collectors, join us as we discover your path to get and stay healthy, increase your income and live with joy and purpose. My guest today is Tracy Pleschourt, founder of Self Made you and the host of Secrets of Self Made Podcast. And the host of Secrets of the Self Made podcast, which helps men and women achieve their goals and solve all problems fast by developing self-control. Welcome, Tracy, I'm excited to be here. Sure, before we get into what you do, could you tell us who is Tracy Pleschourt?

Tracy Pleschourt: 1:33

Yes, I would love to. So I am a certified life coach. I coach lots of different types of people with lots of different types of desires. I teach them how to think differently. I think most of us can agree that our formal education system taught us what to think, but it didn't necessarily teach us how to think, and so we end up leaving that part of our life, that time of our life, and jumping into real-world situations without having an understanding of how to overcome obstacles, solve problems, how to achieve goals, how to really create what it is that we most desire. I don't think enough people are taught how to think so that they are fueled by emotions that have you showing up, in a way, taking responsibility for the results that you have in your life, whether they're unintentional or intentional. So that's where I have literally dedicated my life to, and so I created Self Made U back in 2020 and started teaching people a way of operating so that they tap into the part of their brain that's very intentional, that can respond versus react, and giving them really kind of a methodology to follow to create anything that they want from their life.

J. Rosemarie Francis: 3:07

Okay, all right, thank you for sharing, and I know you gave the reason for starting to do what you do. Is there any personal inspiration that caused you to go in this direction?

Tracy Pleschourt: 3:21

Yes, well, I definitely struggled with a lot of, you know, self-loathing type thoughts and feelings. I struggled with overeating. I also struggled with over-drinking. You know I have had my own personal professional struggles and really, you know, did a lot of damage during my journey of trying to better understand how to get what it is that I really want. I, you know, spent so much time in this kind of spin of, you know, berating myself, thinking that I was broken and not learning about myself and why I was feeling the way I was feeling. And once I recognize that and I recognize that I'm not unique like there's a lot of people out there suffering unnecessarily, I created this way of operating this four-part system and set out to teach it, and teach it in a way that can be applied to absolutely anything in your life. So, whether you struggle with overeating, over-drinking, if you're struggling with the relationships, maybe it's your career performance you can apply this way of operating the self-control operating system progress towards what it is that you really ultimately want right.

J. Rosemarie Francis: 4:49

So I like to use the word discipline. People like to say, well, I can't help it, or I'm this way because and I often tell me myself mostly that All it takes is discipline and the term for that, the one you're using, is self control. So, yeah, so I think we, we failed to recognize that it's our control, things are within our control, but unless we exercise that self control, then we don't get what we, what we want, right? Okay, thank you. I think a lot of people.

Tracy Pleschourt: 5:30

I think a lot of people think of self control as an action. You know they're thinking of it as something they're either doing or not doing. They're either, you know, walking past the plate of cookies without grabbing one, or you know they have the self control, you know, to leave it alone.

J. Rosemarie Francis: 5:46

And.

Tracy Pleschourt: 5:46

I have self control more in the context of the ability to choose how you want to think and how you want to feel. That is, to me, that's what self control means. It's a way of operating and it is. It is a feeling, and it can feel like discipline. I would say it feels more like self reliance, but it's, it's also a way of operating. So it is an action, but it's also a thought and a feeling, and it's ultimately the result that you experience too. So it's very comprehensive. But the acronym self SELF is what I use to actually teach how to create the self control. And so the S stands for self coaching. We teach our clients how to self coach. It's just the art of asking yourself questions. We teach our clients how to eliminate the obstacles that they can and cannot see. So the ones that they can't see tend to be those saboteur narratives that they're listening to, that their primitive brain is is offering them. Sometimes it can be as simple as eliminating the obstacles that they can see, but they sabotage themselves by not eliminating those things. The L stands for leveraging your prodigy brain strengths. So we have, we all have five strengths that are only available to us through our prefrontal cortex, our prodigy brain, and we teach our clients how to leverage those. And then the F stands for forging intentional results. And there's always best practices, no matter when is that you want to create for yourself? There's best practices, but I don't want you to be fooled into believing that it's all about the best practices, because it's not. It's a comprehensive approach of making sure that you're operating from a belief that you actually do have control, and that belief is going to fuel conviction, confidence, courage, curiosity, which will have you showing up really like utilizing best practices in a much different way. And so you want to make sure that you're taking the right steps in the right order and we do get to best practices. That's not, you know, that's only one piece of the puzzle.

J. Rosemarie Francis: 8:23

Yeah, ok, all right, I hear you talking and I'm thinking taking full responsibility for your own self, mm-hmm yeah and all of your results. Yeah, okay, all right, thank you. So what is the first step to change?

Tracy Pleschourt: 8:43

You know it's really making a decision. You have to decide what it is that you want. Without making a decision, you're typically kind of spinning. You don't really have, you know, the that focus. So making the decision is the quickest way to feeling in control. So many people are, you know, kind of wandering out there listening to their primitive brain. That makes them feel defeated. And the simplest first step is just to make a decision, and it doesn't have to be an earth-shattering decision. Right literally the decision that today I'm going to work on better understanding myself. Today I'm gonna start to become the person who doesn't beat herself up, who really Recognize a recognizes why my default thinking looks like this you know I mean. All that goes to a lot of messaging throughout our life and, without questioning some of those beliefs, we start to operate from them, and sometimes they're very sabotaging types of beliefs. So you might just simply decide that you're gonna become the person that starts to question Some of these beliefs that you've been operating from. Right decide is always the first step.

Okay, and it sounds like an easy step, but it isn't really. But I get it All right. So what is the most common obstacle? And and I'm kind of jumping in the middle here, because A lot of times we tell people, you know, create goals and you know you will achieve them. Usually that's what we say Set the goals and you'll achieve them. But what is the biggest obstacle to achieving those goals?

Yeah, I think the biggest obstacle is is not really Utilizing a system that works that is actually comprehensive. So if you are somebody who believes All you got to do is set goals in order to achieve them, that is a very misguided belief and, because it's not that easy, you have to make sure that you have an area of focus, that you've decided what it is that you want to achieve. So, just like we were just talking about, that's always the first step, right? So we use a system that we know works for us. So you make a decision. Then you start self coaching. You start asking yourself like why do I want to make that decision? Do I like my reasons? Why, what's keeping me from achieving that? Why haven't I achieved it until now? Or why haven't I achieved that yet? Ask yourself those questions. That's, that's the second step of self-coaching. Now, what are the obstacles that are in my way? What's the narratives that I'm listening to? That's the next step. So I would say the biggest obstacle for most people is that they haven't found a comprehensive system that gets them from point A to point Z. They are shooting blindly in the dark and doing things like just setting a goal and believing that that's all it takes Right. We know we're operating from a system.

Yeah, all right, thank you All right. So what is Tracy grateful for today?

Oh, today I am grateful for my clients. I've been on coaching calls all morning and you know my clients are always a source of inspiration for me. We all have that same three pound organ in between our ears that is sabotaging us If we aren't aware of the thoughts that we're operating from. It's actively sabotaging you every moment of every day. I'm a life coach. I'm a certified life coach. I forget that. I find myself spinning out in lots of unwanted feelings. So I'm really grateful that this is my job, that I can make a living from this and, at the exact same time, really help people better understand themselves and recognize that they're not broken that they are just listening to a part of their brain that you know. God intended that part of your brain to keep you safe, but it can sabotage you if you're just operating by default from it and you're reacting to it. So I'm yeah, I'm very grateful for the opportunity to have that constant reminder that we're all human and we just really need to be reminded of a system to operate from that gets us closer to what it is that we want and that looks different for everybody.

Yes, all right, thank you. Thank you for sharing that. All right, so you're talk to a solo mom and tell them, tell her how you can help her and you know, just walk us through how you can be of service to a solo mom and then tell us how we can get in touch with you.

Yeah, so you know, I would tell her that you know understanding what it is that she's actually feeling. A lot of us shy away from digging into what it is that we're actually experiencing. It's very scary to look at our own feelings, and so I would ask her to articulate, look, really dive into the vocabulary that she has around feelings and decide how is it that she's feeling today and connect that feeling back to the thought that she's thinking. Right there she is setting herself up for a mind-blowing experience where she recognizes how much control she has when she realizes she's feeling defeated because she has a thought that she has to do this alone. The feeling of defeated or discouraged is not coming from the circumstance of being alone. It's coming from the thought or the belief that she's alone and that can be the biggest aha moment of somebody's life. So it can be that simple just deciding how long it is that you're feeling and why you're feeling that way, connecting it back to the belief that you're thinking. This is what we do all day, every day. So if your solo mom wants to better understand kind of the next steps, I would highly recommend going to our website selfmadeyoucom so it's S-E-L-F-M-A-D-E and then the letter youcom. We have all sorts of free resources. We have a $27 Masterclass where I teach the operating system and then send you on your way to apply it to anything in your life. If you want more help, we have more help, more offers available as well, but we have a lot of free and low dollar offers that I highly recommend everybody, starting with.

Okay, and are you on Instagram?

We're on every social media channel. The best place to go, because it will connect you to everything, is the website. But yes, we're on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok.

Okay, all right, thank you, Okay, so I'll put those links in the show notes, as well as the link to your podcast, and yeah, so we'll get those there so people can connect with you. Yeah, sounds wonderful, yeah, so, oh, I like this one. How can people create a roadmap to monetize their purpose? This one is kind of close to my heart, so let's finish out with that.

So I think that monetizing your purpose is really what a lot of entrepreneurs are doing. They are feeling called or they have a passion for something, and it really is more about understanding yourself. Like really understanding what drives you, what inspires you, what is the role that you play in your life as well as other people's lives. Like really understanding those characteristics of yourself is going to make monetizing any passion that you have so much easier. So it's a very introspective roadmap that looks like, again, understanding yourself and using that acronym S-E-L-F through self-coaching, through eliminating those obstacles, through leveraging your prodigy brain strengths, through forging the intentional results or the best practices, you can monetize anything, but it's so much more rewarding if it's something that you're feeling called to do, if you really feel like it's your life's purpose. So, yeah, it really all goes back to operating through understanding yourself, the S-E-L-F.

Thank you, and it might seem that we're jumping all over the place, but it all connects to the same thing, right? Yeah, I think that's it. So. Yeah, thank you very much, Tracy, for coming and speaking to us on Solar Moms Talk. Any parting shots?

You know, I think I really like to remind people that if you are feeling defeated, if you're feeling broken, if you're feeling alone, you don't have to feel that way, that you actually do have a choice, that there are other options in regards to the way you're feeling, and it all goes back to the choice that you have in regards to how you think, and you just haven't yet been taught how to think in order to generate the feelings that you want to be having, and so you're not broken, you just haven't yet been taught. J. Rosemarie Francis: 19:58 Ah, I like that, thank you. Okay, thank you. I appreciate you coming and speaking to us today, tracy. I appreciate you, my pleasure, thanks for having me. Yeah.